I had sex with her twice more after that night, but stopped because I’d become absolutely disgusted with myself. Not only was I sleeping with her daughter from time to time, I felt I was taking advantage of her alcoholism. My therapist insists NO, she was a predator, I was a kid, she was the adult. Hard to argue with that intellectually, but I’ve always felt an inordinate amount of shame about this. I ultimately attempted suicide between my senior year in high school and college, I felt like that was the only way to stop my addiction and behavior.
How did this turn out?
I had sex with her twice more after that night, but stopped because I’d become absolutely disgusted with myself. Not only was I sleeping with her daughter from time to time, I felt I was taking advantage of her alcoholism. My therapist insists NO, she was a predator, I was a kid, she was the adult. Hard to argue with that intellectually, but I’ve always felt an inordinate amount of shame about this. I ultimately attempted suicide between my senior year in high school and college, I felt like that was the only way to stop my addiction and behavior.
I tried to kill myself in my senior year of high school, too, but for different reasons.
I know where you are, where you are coming from, and where I am. I'm writing about that for Substack right now.
https://kiwiwriter47.substack.com/p/mathematics-and-me-part-one
I’ll read. I’ve written a short piece about my suicide attempt and plan to post in a few days. I’m intrigued by your battle with math…
Lifelong struggle.
I have to remind myself that I NEVER have to face a math problem again.